All reporting below is non-fiction; I was tempted to spice things up, but the actual happenings are themselves quite exciting, so I left it the way it happened.
[This happened ~Dec 11, 2007. I had noted down the details and shared with some friends by email.]
At the hotel "Museum Inn" in Bangalore:
Anand (on the phone) : Could you get me today's The Hindu and Times of India? I would like both of them.
Reception: Yes Sir; Surely Sir.
(after 5 min, call from Reception)
Reception: Sir, we wanted to check if you want only The Hindu or only Times of India or both.
Anand: I would like both.
(after 5 min, call from Reception)
Reception: Sir, we have asked the boy to get you the paper, Sir. Do you also want the Business Standard Sir? Neither Times of India nor The Hindu has a good business section, Sir.
Anand: No, I would like only these two.
(after 5 min, a boy appears at the doorstep)
Boy1: Sir, here is The Hindu, Sir.
Anand: I had asked for the Times of India also.
Boy1: Oh. I will check with the Reception, Sir.
(returning to the table and realizing that it is The Hindu of the earlier day)
(making a call to the reception)
Anand: Hello. I had asked for both The Hindu and Times of India. A boy came and gave me The Hindu, but he gave me yesterday's issue and not today's. Also, I do not have Times of India. Again, I would like today's issue of Times of India.
Reception: Sorry Sir. We will correct it immediately. Do you want yesterday's Times of India also, Sir?
Anand: No, I would like only today's.
(after 3 min, a different boy appears at the doorstep)
Boy2: Sir, Here is today's issue of The Hindu, Sir.
Anand: Thank you (did not want to question about the ToI)
(after 3 min, Boy1 is back)
Boy1: Sorry Sir, I did not see properly and brought yesterday's issue of The Hindu. I realized it when I went back. Here is today's The Hindu.
Anand: Oh, thats ok. Another boy just came by and gave me today's The Hindu. I had also asked for the Times of India. Today's Times of India. Can you get me that?
(after 2 min, Boy2 is back)
Boy2: Sir, I was told that you got yesterday's The Hindu by mistake. Can I take it back, Sir?
(Anand returning yesterday's issue; Deciding not to bring up the Times
of India issue)
(after 5 min, Boy2 is back)
Boy2: Sir, I was told that you need Times of India also. Did you get it already Sir?
Anand: I did not get it, but there was another boy who was going to get it for me.
(after 10 min, no news from either Boy1 or Boy2)
(after the above incidents, if I were you, I would not have called up anyone for ToI again. But, since I am I, I call up the Reception)
Anand: Hello. I had asked for today's Times of India and did not get it.
Reception: Oh. I thought somebody came for that already. Sorry for the delay, Sir
(after 5 min, Boy2 is back)
Boy2: Sir, I was walking by the reception, and found today's Times of India. So, I brought it, Sir.
Anand: OK. Thanks. If you see any other boys bringing me Times of India, please ask them not to.
(after 3 min, Boy3 arrives!!)
Boy3: The reception told me you want Times of India, Sir, Here is today's Times of India, Sir.
Anand: Oh. Somebody already brought it for me. Thanks but I do not need this.
(after 1 min, call from reception)
Reception: Sir, you had asked for Times of India, but now the Boy says you do not want it.
Anand: Oh. Sorry for the confusion, but the boy who brought me The Hindu before also brought me the Times of India this time. I am sorry I did not call you and tell you.
(after 5 min, Boy1 comes back!!)
Boy1: Sorry Sir, I had to go to the shop nearby to get the Times of India; only yesterday's issue was there with us in the service room. I brought both, Sir, just in case you want both.
Anand (speechless, not wanting to explain again, and make the poor boy lose the satisfaction of delivering, since I had already rejected today's The Hindu before):
Oh. Thanks a lot. Sorry for all the trouble.
Finally, I had 1 copy of The Hindu and two copies of Times of India and had successfully tired out 3 servicemen! :(
It would have taken me 4 min to walk down to the lobby and pick up both the papers for today (which I had seen when I entered the lobby).
While I was looking for "service", I wasted ~45 min!
To atone for all the bad karma, I read both papers almost from start
to finish :)
